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“The man as he converses is the lover; silent he is the husband”

Honore de Balzac

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Simplified Meaning:

When a man is talking and engaging in conversation, he is putting in the effort to connect emotionally and show his affection, similar to how lovers act when they are trying to build a relationship. However, once he stops talking and becomes quiet, he has settled into the role of a husband, where the need for constant romantic gestures and words is less frequent because there is already a secure bond. Imagine a couple who is dating. When they are getting to know each other, they have endless conversations, share stories, and constantly express their feelings. This is the romantic, "lover" phase. But as time passes, and if they get married, their daily life becomes routine, and some of that constant chatter might fade. They don’t need to talk as much to understand each other because they have a deep, unspoken connection as "husband and wife." This quote suggests that initial love is often more vocal and expressive, while long-term love can be quieter but just as strong. Someone can apply this to their life by understanding that relationships evolve. Even if the outward expressions of love change, the underlying bond can still be very solid and meaningful. Knowing this can help people appreciate the quiet moments in their relationships and not always expect the same level of verbal affection that was there at the beginning.

Related tags
Communication Conversations Husband Intimacy Love Marriage Relationships Romance Silent
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