"لا يمكننا التفكير في أن نكون مقبولين لدى الآخرين حتى نثبت أولاً أننا مقبولون لدى أنفسنا."

The core idea here is that to be truly accepted by others, you first need to accept and value yourself. Self-acceptance is the foundation for external validation. If you’re not comfortable with who you are, it’s tough to believe others will be comfortable with you either.

Let’s roll back the clock to put this in a bit of context. This idea has been around for centuries, touched upon by philosophers like Socrates who said, "Know thyself." But it gained significant traction in more modern times, especially during the self-help boom of the 20th century. People started realizing that self-worth isn't just fluff—it's fundamental to how we interact with the world.

Now, think of a real-life example. Picture Sara, a talented artist who constantly doubts her abilities. She’s always seeking approval from her peers but never feels satisfied with their praise. No matter how many people compliment her work, she can’t shake the feeling that she’s not good enough. This self-doubt prevents her from fully enjoying her art and building meaningful connections with others in her field. It’s only when Sara starts to see and value her own talent that things change. She takes time to appreciate her own progress and strengths. Gradually, she starts to believe in herself. This newfound self-acceptance radiates, and people begin to see her confidence and respect her even more.

So, how do you apply this wisdom in your own life? Start by doing a little soul-searching. Spend time reflecting on your strengths and achievements. Write them down if it helps. Challenge negative thoughts about yourself—would you say those things to a friend? Probably not. So, why say them to yourself? Surround yourself with positive influences, whether that means friends who uplift you or books and podcasts that inspire you. And remember, this is a process. Self-acceptance doesn’t happen overnight. It’s about building a habit of valuing who you are.

Imagine you’re at a coffee shop, talking with a friend. You tell them about a time you felt like an impostor at work. You kept waiting for someone to call you out as a fraud, even though you had the credentials and had done great work. Your friend listens and then shares their own story of feeling the same way when they first became a parent, constantly second-guessing every decision. You both laugh, realizing that everyone has moments of doubt. But here’s the kicker: those doubts didn’t stop you from doing your job or your friend from raising their kid. What changed? Over time, you both learned to trust yourselves. Maybe you realized that no one really has it all figured out, and that’s okay. Accepting that you’re doing your best is a huge part of accepting yourself.

So, next time you catch yourself craving someone else’s approval, pause. Ask yourself if you’re looking for something you should be giving yourself. It’s like trying to fill a bucket with a hole in it—no matter how much water you pour in, it’ll never be full. Patch the hole first, and you’ll find that you don’t need nearly as much from the outside to feel content. And when you do get that external validation, it’ll just be the cherry on top, not the whole sundae.