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"Electric toothbrushes are good too, only I prefer them up my ass so I can listen to rock and roll while I ride my bicycle"

Translations

MORE QUOTES BY George Carlin

“I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don’t have as many people who believe it”

George Carlin

“A joke is a very serious thing”

“When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foot's hands.”

“Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town”

FEATURED QUOTES

“You can overcome anything, if and only if you love something enough”

“The moment you give up is the moment you let someone else win.”

“Failure is not the opposite of success; it's part of success”

“People who take risks are the people you'll lose against”

“Habit is the best of all servants, or the worst of all masters.”

“The more powerful and original a mind, the more it will incline towards the religion of solitude”

“An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.”

“Happiness comes when you believe in what you are doing.”

“At sometime in our lives a devil dwells within us, causes heartbreaks, confusion and troub...”

“It always seems impossible until it's done.”