"如果你不能准确地表达你的感受和想法，你最好什么也别说。"

Sharing how you truly feel isn't just about honesty—it's about connection. When you hold back your feelings, whether out of fear or politeness, you're essentially building a barrier between yourself and others. This wall prevents real understanding and intimacy. It's like trying to have a phone conversation with terrible reception; you might hear a bit of the other person's words, but the true meaning gets lost in the static.

This sentiment is echoed by many throughout history, but a good modern context for this idea can be seen in personal relationships and professional settings. Imagine you're at work and your boss asks for feedback on a project. If you just nod and say, "It's fine," when you actually think there are big issues, you're doing a disservice to both of you. Your boss doesn't get the insight they need to improve the project, and you might end up frustrated when the same mistakes happen again.

Let's take a real-life example to drive this home. Think about a couple, Jane and Tom. They’ve been married for a few years, and recently, Jane feels like Tom isn’t as attentive as he used to be. She misses their long conversations and spontaneous date nights. But instead of telling Tom how she feels, she just bottles it up. She thinks, “I don’t want to start a fight,” or “Maybe it’s just me being needy.” So, Jane stays quiet.

Over time, her resentment builds. She starts to pull away emotionally, and Tom senses that something’s off. But he’s confused because Jane never said anything. Eventually, the distance between them grows, leading to arguments about trivial things. If Jane had been honest and told Tom, “I miss our quality time together. Can we make an effort to have more date nights?” they could have worked on it together and avoided the resentment.

So, how do you apply this wisdom? Start small. Practice expressing your feelings in low-stakes situations. If a friend’s comment hurts you, let them know. Say, “Hey, that joke you made earlier kind of stung. I know you didn’t mean it that way, but I wanted to share how I felt.” It might feel awkward at first, but with time, it becomes more natural.

And think about this: being honest about your feelings doesn’t mean being unkind. It’s about finding the right words and the right moment. Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. For example, “I feel…” rather than “You make me feel…” This way, you’re expressing your feelings without placing blame on the other person.

Imagine you’re at a family dinner, and your uncle makes a political comment that you strongly disagree with. Instead of staying silent and stewing in your frustration, you might say, “I see things differently, and I’d love to share my perspective if you’re open to it.” This invites a conversation rather than a confrontation.

At the end of the day, being open and honest about your feelings fosters genuine relationships. It's scary, sure. But the alternative—living a life where your true self is hidden—is far scarier. So, take a deep breath, find your voice, and speak your truth.