Humor Quotes

"I don’t believe in being serious about anything. I think life is too serious to be taken seriously." "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." "I can't sing and I can't dance, but I can lick any SOB in the house. " "Sometimes the funniest thing to say is mean." "Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke" "Humor is such a wonderful thing, helping you realize what a fool you are but how beautiful that is at the same time" "Cricket is basically baseball on valium" "I'm always amazed that people take what I say seriously. I don't even take what I am seriously." "I re-invented my image so many times that I'm in denial that I was originally an overweight Korean woman." "Why do you laugh? Change the name and the story is about you" "There's nothing like deep breaths after laughing that hard. Nothing in the world like a sore stomach for the right reasons" "I feel sorry for people who don’t drink because when they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day" "Humor can be dissected as a frog can but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind" "If life gives you limes, make margaritas" "I liked peanut butter. Peanut butter never got another woman pregnant. Peanut butter never made me cry. Nobody cared if you were photographed in a club with a jar of Jif"