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Humor Quotes

"The funniest things are forbidden."

"The best proof of extraterrestrial intelligence is that they haven't contacted us"

"If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance."

"The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired"

"Tobacco is my favorite vegetable"

"The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog"

"Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough."

"It's true hard work never killed anybody but why take the chance?"

"Laughter is the best medicine. It cures everything."

"It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them"

"Common sense ain't common."

"Being married means I can break wind and eat ice cream in bed"

"I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends will call it"

"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline"

"He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career."

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