Irony Quotes

"I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five" "Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow." "Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose." "There is a kind of splendid stupidity" "To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness." "In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." "Many go out for wool and come home shorn themselves." "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it." "Many a true word is spoken in jest " "It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness" "The worst thing about being wise is that you are perpetually being asked why you aren’t rich." "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." "Be careful about reading health books. You may die" "A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong" "I'll say things that are serious and put them in a joke form so people can enjoy them"