Humor Quotes

"Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy" "Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage" "If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning." "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." "A pessimist is a man who has been compelled to live with an optimist." "Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage" "The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog" "No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade be " "Before I refuse to take your questions, I have an opening statement" "I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I’m in a cabinet meeting"